People wonder why we had another school shooting like yesterday?
I’ll tell you why.
And it has nothing to do with guns.
It’s because our American families have fallen apart.
Families don’t spend time together. Kids aren’t meant to be raised in these hectic homes today that we have created since the 1980s.
Bobby has a ballgame.
Cindy has a choir rehearsal at church.
Mom has to make a casserole for the Christmas get together with her coworkers they all wanted.
Dad has to work on a set for the school play and make sure Bobby gets to ball practice and that Cindy gets home from church after mom drops her off before she starts to work on the casserole. Mom can’t BUY a casserole because her coworker Henrietta will talk bad about her for BUYING something instead of MAKING something homemade. (true story there, I heard it one time myself).
If families ever get together under the same roof, they all get plates and go to their screens in separate rooms and don’t see each other. On their TV sets, they watch dysfunctional families arguing incessantly because for some reason that’s the only comedy that we can watch now: family arguments.
On their YouTube channels, they watch snarky and cynical spoofs of life as we know it. Sarcasm is the new normal.
Our new ‘normal’ is jacked up and nobody is paying attention. We’re so busy trying to make sure that Cindy believes that she can be an astrophysicist that we don’t have time to help Bobby believe that he can make a good living one day installing heating and air conditioners.
Dad can’t parent because he lives under the new rule of ‘happy wife, happy life’ and mom wants Bobby to get a trophy because he showed up for ball.
Bobby totally sucks at playing baseball but nobody can tell him that and help him with his batting or it might ‘hurt his self-esteem’.
We pay WAYYYY more attention to our ‘fur babies’ than we do the human lives that we’ve created that have our DNA. I mean, after all, Freddy the poodle doesn’t give us lip when we correct them.
We’re our kids ‘friends’ now and we feel like we should let them make their own decisions instead of saying ‘Cindy, go put something on to cover your body, have some self-respect’. ‘Bobby, boy, you pull your pants up and tuck your shirt in and act like you have some raising’.
We let them set their own curfew and show up when they ‘feel’ like it because we don’t want to argue with them. When we shouldn’t be arguing with our kids anyway.
Arguing with your kids only makes you a kid again. Set rules and enforce them. End of story. Kids need to know that they’re loved and protected even when they don’t want it.
And EVERY TIME the church opens we’re dragging them through the door. I mean, it’s the church! It’s better than them being on the street? right?
Well, sometimes the kids need to be at home with a mama and a daddy around ONE tv watching something they all agree on and laughing together. Or just no TV and talking. How novel. Talk about your days.
And Bobby and Cindy have baseball lessons, basketball lessons, cheerleading lessons, debate team, knitting lessons and ain’t none of these things got anything to do with their futures.
Jobs? nope. They’ve been told they can work when they grow up. Horse poop. Life’s about work and making a living. I’ve worked since I was 15 and our kids have worked since they were both 16 and turned into FANTASTIC and responsible adults. They never had a TV in their bedrooms. We gathered together as a family each night their whole lives and yes, we watched 101 Dalmatians, Space Jam and Cinderella until we could recite them by line. But we did it all for our kids.
Not for us.
We didn’t watch the new episodes of ‘Friends’ when it came on when we had kids. We watched what they wanted and played with them and laughed. They’re adults now and we can catch back up. We watch Friends reruns now that our kids are grown. Our kids came first.
And they were allowed to do one extracurricular activity each.
Until everyone decides to get families back together, quit worrying if they’re all keeping up with the Jones’ activities at church and the ballpark, limit screen time, refocus more on the children than our pets, start being a parent that loves AND disciplines instead of conveniently being a friend to the children, teaching respect and quit worrying if people are offended if they bought a casserole instead of making one, then we are raising our children in total chaos where they are unsure if they are protected and loved and we are destined to continue with school shootings and angry outbursts like we have now.
stepping off the podium.